Why did he abuse me but not her? What's the matter with me?

Originally I wanted to ask my Subbies/viewers for input on what to speak about next (I do have a video ready though, just need editing) but suddenly my mouth, my heart opened up , as my sweet Subbies has written to me asking why I'm so blue? And it's very hard for me to openly speak about this and share this to the viewers, but that's one of the reasons to why many Subbies have asked me if I'm okay as I don't look as happy as I'm used to, and you're right, I am sad, and this reason I speak about is one of the huge reasons to why I'm sad at the moment. It's therapeutic for me to be honest and share my feelings but I feel very naked, but I hope you'll understand why I'm not so "peppy" as one of my Subbies wrote to me! And maybe there are other people out there thinking, feeling what I'm going through and hopefully understand you're not alone? Or maybe I'm the only one on this earth who think/feel like this? Lol! I'm okay, and I've been thinking a lot wether I should upload this or not, but I want to be honest to my viewers/Subbies and don't want to say I'm okay when I'm not, I'm not depressed, it's not that, I'm sad and I need to move on and close a huge chapter of my life and it's hard. But the show must go on! My daughter and I am starting a new life, we are just waiting for a new apartment, but it takes time but the process has started and even though I'm afraid of the unknown, I'm looking forward to see what's on the other side of the door! Don't feel bad,sorry or even pity for me. This is my life, my stupid choices in the past, my karma, the prize I'm paying for choosing stupidly in my past. It's okay. Thanks for listening and I do hope this can help someone? Please leave a comment, like or subscribe if you want to!!! Xoxo ak, Copenhagen Web: http://www.rumlerille.dk/ Mail: rumlerille@hotmail.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/rumlerille Tweet: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCDVtACy63QwxBpILRiavlCQ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rumlerille/ Other Youtube Channels: Our donation channel: Save loco: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCDVtACy63QwxBpILRiavlCQ My other channel: Paranormal mom https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCruGfl6felIpGT2-KMBnQ1Q Main, Dealer Mom: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC6dSuqjgwl-DW5I9IzVPRhw Copenhgen, Denmark ;-)